Zoning Out at the Airport

I'm blogging from Phoenix while on a layover on my way to Palm Springs.  I'm feeling a little out of place with my sweater and wool socks.  Did I say 'out of place'? Sorry, I meant to say 'wicked hot'.  However, I couldn't resist my five dollar burnt coffee.  I'll figure out later where to put that on my travel expense form.  In the meantime, I have to find someone to share my coffee with so that I can justify the expense.

I think that airlines made a great improvement to their plane boarding process when they implemented the Zone seating system.  If you haven't travelled recently, let me explain.  The airlines found that the attendants couldn't keep track of the row numbers or count higher than 10.  Therefore, management simplified things by grouping rows into Zones.  The boarding passes now tell you what Zone you are grouped into and when the attendant calls your Zone number, you get in a long line.  I realize that we all have the option of getting in line early regardless of our Zone designation.  The main advantage to this approach is that you don't have to hang way back and tell at least a dozen people what Zones were called while they were getting magazines bought for the sole purpose of telling other airline passengers what type of person they are.  The disadvantage of being a zone-butter is the scolding you will get from an underpaid airline worker.

This morning, my boarding pass said Zone 6.  I waited about 15 minutes while other people boarded the plane and I answered questions.  When the Zone 5-ers got in line, I was left standing there with one other guy and a cleaning person waiting for us to move along.  

I realized that if there were a Zone after 6, it would be called "Zone Out."  That's because when they finally called my Zone, I was staring out the window and probably drooling.  It was movement by the guy next to me that prompted me to get in line.  The cleaning person's pacing was also incentive.

When we landed, I realized that the attendants and their management no longer care about the Zone system when unboarding starts.  Zone 6 should have been the first group off the plane, but my boarding pass must have dissolved in my pocket.  This phase of the trip is called the "Zone for All."